14 June 2010

The Voices in My Head...

The white walls no longer seem scary as I walk to find my next test subject.
My clipboard in hand I sit across from her. She stares off into oblivion and I have to shield my pitying face with my very own clipboard, it’s just the silly cardboard kind but it does the trick.
Taking a deep breath to compose myself I set my pen and clipboard silently on a low coffee table between us. Her hair is dishevelled and her clothes are miles too big, but I don’t think she has yet realised this, nor do I think does she know I am here.
“My name,” I begin slowly, “is Ms. Wonderland and I have a few questions to ask you,” I say gesturing to the clipboard. “May I begin?” she nods awkwardly at my question, leading me to proceed.
“Please state your name for the record,” she answers plainly with just two letters: NJ.
“You have made claims of hearing voices, are they just that or are they personalities? I mean is it just sounds and voices or do you believe they are entities created by your own mind?” I try to simplify and know I’ve failed.
“There is more than one,” she states and I’m led to believe she is more lucid than I first thought.
“Would you please elaborate,” I ask gesturing for her to continue.
“The first... I’m not sure of her name,” she quickly states as I nod pen poised over clipboard ready to jot down the names and personas of NJ’s inner psyche. “All I know is that she is the mother of Peter Rabbit, she’s very bossy. She keeps telling me to stay out of the farmer’s fields. She once tried grounding me for not listening to her mothering tales.
“The other is an insane French flower child, who is too wild for her own good or mine. She goes by the name Anony Mous and she keeps leading me down the paths closest to the farmer’s fields. But who could blame her when the farmer grows this herb that manages to make it all right. I think she takes advice from the voices in her own head.”
I sat pen still poised over clipboard, speechless at what this patient just revealed and stunned that as she spoke she mimicked all my movements (even the subtle ones) perfectly.

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